Her Features
by Ms. AtomicBomb
Summary: Her lips, her hair, her eyes, and her skin —they are all something he really loved about her. He wanted to kiss her and hold her tight, but she wanted otherwise. He could always withstand her bluntness, but definitely not this time around. He returns years later to find out that he has a child. He promises to be a better father this time around.
1. Chapter 1

It was her lips, they were the first thing he saw. They moved quickly when announcing words and sentences and they curled into a smile only a few times -from what he had seen. She had said that it was because there was nothing much that made her smile nowadays; life was rather hard. Things were not as simple as they were when she was younger, at least that was what her lips would mumble. He noticed that those pale lips of hers would never tell a lie, they would refrain from telling him the truth on occasions, keeping shut -but with a sweet and gentle kiss to them, they would spill all they had intended to keep. The pair of lips were also warm when coming into can't act with his own. The always tasted of something sweet -sweeter than honey or wine.

Her hair was something he found so soft. He would run his hands through it as she slept in his arms in the nighttime. Sometimes it was held in high pony tails while others, it was in a bun, with braids adorning it. It was on rare occasion that she let it loose. The blonde strands would insist they were gold whilst in the sunshine. They would shine like newly polished chains of gold; something so mesmerizing and beautiful. It was beyond him when he would witness her hair in the sun. He had told her that if she were to leave her hair down while she walked the streets, someone was bound to mistaken it for gold and take her away -yet he only said that because he never wanted anyone else to see how beautiful it made her look.

He could stare into her eyes for years, or so he would claim. They were jewels that made many kings rage war against one another and knights fight until their dying breath for even the smallest of glances. Emeralds, that was what he called them, emeralds that made him fall in a trance -making him hypnotized like a sailor upon meeting a siren. She would often say that she hated her eyes because he was right, they caused only pain. Yet he had never made that claim, making men fall to their graves did not cause them pain, it caused them the sweetest form of love. Her eyes were something he found so lovely about her. Her eyes led him to another world, a world beyond his comprehension; somewhere he would always feel safe and relieved. He would always want to escape to the world they held, a world where he needn't worry about a single thing only to love her.

Pale skin turned red upon a soft and innocent touch, like ivory somehow mixing with roses. He would caress her cheek on occasion and her cheeks would flood with a sweet pink colour, taking her cheeks hostage. His fingers would hover over her skin, almost like ghosts in the dead of night because he did not want to wake her in the midst of the night. Skin so soft and creamy white, it always called for his attention; begging him for a touch, small, and sweet. Some mornings, she would awaken with bruises on her skin and he would kiss them with much tenderness, even if she would complain every time he touched her. He knew that she was not used to such loving acts, she had been a king in her life, she was not someone to like the touch of others. He wanted to change that because he truly loved her skin.

"I have told you not to touch me." She mumbled lightly, those lips moving just a little bit as the words escaped them.

His hand was hovering over her waist before he let it drop to take its place next to him. "Yes, of course." Although he always respected her wishes, he longed to hold her in his arms.

She took a deep sigh. "I hate feeling inferior and that is why I do not like touches." She had to say something because she knew that he was already sulking behind her.

"I know, you've told me many times over. But touch does not mean that you are inferior, it only means that I am in love with you." He was the only to say those words in the entirety of their relationship. She had never explained her feelings towards him and he had never pressured or expected her to say them.

"Yes, yes, and they only make me stronger," she huffed, "that is not how I see it, I can only see thy love makes me weaker than I already am. I do not want that."

It was the first time she had voiced her feelings on love, and it hurt him a little bit. "Love does not make you weak." He stated, almost defending himself.

"It does." She grumbled.

He took that statement to offended and drew a hand over his chest. "Then, am I weak to you?"

"I am not saying-"

"Yes, you are leading me to that conclusion." He had cut her off as his tone had become more and more harsh by every word that left his lips.

Her head shook softly. "You are not weak."

"Then? I don't understand why loving me is so hard." He was still offended and quite taken aback and confused.

"Because I cannot love you. I simply cannot." She nearly hissed. "Is that what you want me to say? Because I certainly can't say anything else."

"You harbour absolutely no feelings towards me?" His eyebrows furrowed as he hoped for her to say something for him to feel relieved. But it never came.

"Yes, I do not harbour any feelings towards you." That was all he needed to hear to take a deep sigh and turn about on his heel.

He walked towards the room and pulled out a gym bag from the closet. He was silent and so was she, they did not make a single sound. She walked to the doorway of their shared bedroom and watched as he set the bag on the bed and began to stuff his clothes inside. She did not notice, but his hands were shaking and he was taking unsteady breaths, trying his best to supress his sorrow.

"What are you doing?" She scoffed, not amused with his reactions; or so she let on.

Diarmuid bit his lower lip trying to keep it all in, even as he throat became dry and his heart constricted. "I am leaving, what else would I be doing?" He looked at her, blinking a couple of times and hoping that his sadness was not visible in his copper eyes.

"Leaving? What?" Her eyebrow rose and disappeared behind her golden bangs.

"What is the point of being here if you don't want me to be by your side." He mumbled it, knowing much too well that his voice was shaky.

"Diarmuid, you're making something so small seem important. Now, put your clothes back in the wardrobe and let's watch a movie."

"I have tried to make you love me, but I guess that it's not enough."

"Sop blabbering meaningless things."

"Stop, Arturia. Do not talk to me like that." He took a deep breath. "I'm going now."

"Where to?"

"I'll find a place." Diarmuid grumbled before pushing past her and walking towards the door.

"You'll be back in a few days." She shrugged and landed a hand on her abdomen. "I know."

"Not this time." He said before exiting the house and slowly closing the door behind himself.

The pare of pale lips that said such mean words, the gold strands that were her hair acting like malicious whips, the emeralds that had led him to despair, and the soft ivory skin that screamed at him to leave her alone was how he remembered her. Even after all these years.


	2. Chapter 2

**~Author's Note~**

**Hello everyone! Thank you for returning to read this story! I would like to thank Yami Mizumi and ChronoTimeGuard for pushing me to continue this story. Here's the next chapter but I don't know if you guys still want more after this... Well, I hope you enjoy it! Thank you for wanting to read it!**

**Sincerely,**

**~Ms. AtomicBomb**

* * *

><p>He held a small present bag in his hands, it wasn't much; they were simply those fancy Ferrero chocolates that tasted like heaven. There was no valuable reason as to why he was at her door; he simply wanted to see how she was doing. It was true, he still loved her, but he knew better than to confess again. The confrontation was only an excuse to see her face again, to remember her a different way; not like he had that day.<p>

There was silence as he knocked upon the door, although he was feeling anxious and having second thoughts he forced himself to remain still. He heard shuffling and voices from the other side of the door and then a familiar creak of it as it was opened to reveal a female. She had her hair down as he loved it and wore comfortable looking clothes; something he had never seen on her. Track pants and a tank-top, not really paying attention to the little details of her attire much —not that she would ever care about they way she looked.

Emerald jewels grew wide and expanded the universe with them as he gave a soft and tender smile. "Hello." He greeted and extended his hand to pass the gift over to her, hoping that she was not too surprised.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was low, as if she was trying to hid his presence a secret. Okay, not exactly the welcome he was expecting, but it was only fair.

"I wanted to greet you again." He gave a warm smile, although inside he wanted to give her a sorrowful look; as if to demonstrate that he was still hurt.

There was a little giggle and then he heard soft footsteps running towards them. "Mommy, mommy!" A little girl emerged from behind Arturia. "We're going to be late for school! Come on!" She giggled, happiness beaming from her features and pouring into the atmosphere around him. Although she looked so happy, he felt like dropping the chocolates and turning around to leave, but he had better etiquette than that.

The young girl looked no older than five years of age; she had straight and neat black hair to her waist, but eyes like the evergreen forest. She was beautiful, he thought; just like Arturia. It made his heart constrict as it did that day, but he tried to brush off the feeling. Of course she would move one, idiot.

He concluded that he would not judge her, so he squatted down in front of the young girl and gave a warm smile. "Hello sweetie, what's your name?" He looked the the young beauty.

"Mommy says not to talk to strangers." The girl hid behind her mother's leg, slightly peeking past the track pants.

Arturia looked back at the little girl. "It's alright, you can tell him." Trying to give her approval.

"Is the pretty man a friend of mom's?" She slowly reemerged, still rather shy.

"Kind of." Her mother gave a hopeless smile.

"I'm Aoife. Mom says it's Irish. You write it A-O-I-F-E but pronounce it _Eefa_. I have no idea why, but mom says that that's Irish for you." The girl tried to explain using the best of her abilities. Her cute voice lacing and hugging the words.

"Irish? Mine's Irish too!" Diarmuid smiled at the little girl as he drew a hand to his chest. "I'm Diarmuid."

Aoife clapped her hands together rapidly. "Oh! Goody!"

"Yes, I know how you feel, people always confuse the spelling." He patted her head. "Can I be your friend?"

"Only if mommy allows it." Aoife looked up at Arturia, giving a look of plead. Her eyes growing wide and her lips quivering, she tried to pull her best puppy face.

"Yes, of course. But it is time to get you to school, no? Come on." Arturia took the little girl's hand and began to drag her inside the house, not even wishing to bid a farewell to the male at the door.

"But what about the pretty man?" The young girl pointed at the male that stood from his crouched position.

Arturia looked over at the man and blinked a couple of times, he could see it in her eyes that she did not want to say a single thing about him. "I don't know... He is a busy man."

"I could drive you." Diarmuid offered wanting to spend a little bit of more time with Arturia and her child.

Her daughter pulled on her hand. "Mommy, please let him come; my friends will want to see him!"

"But-"

"Pleeeease?" The girl begged.

"Fine, as long as he only drives us." Arturia gave in, and as she lifted her head from the girl she looked upon the male in front of her; of which had a triumphant smile in his lips.

They had dropped off the young little girl and then Diarmuid went to return Arturia to her apartment. The ride was rather quite and only random songs on the radio filled the silence between them. It was getting hard and rather awkward that it felt as if he was choking on the air between them. She did not need to say anything for him to notice that she was much more bitter than coffee upon his presence.

"I hope that your husband does not mind." He spoke softly, wanting to break the deafening silence.

"Husband? Pardon?" She turned her head toward him and blinked, rather rapidly.

"Oh, well..." Diarmuid took a hand off the steering wheel and scratched his head. "People usually get married when they have children and well... There's nothing wrong with not getting married and all." He said it quickly, not wanting to offend her.

"I live alone." Arturia murmured. "Only my daughter and I share the apartment."

"It must be hard." Alright, he should not have said that, and he knew that clearly; but he did not want the conversation to drop there.

It was hissed. "No, personally I can manage."

"I'm sorry about the father leaving you." He needed to shut his mouth, but the words kept on rolling out of his mouth. His perfect composure and chivalrousness was crumbled with every word he continued to say.

"It was my fault." She added and returned her gaze to the dashboard of the car, looking into the distance. "I sort of drove him away."

"But it is still his fault for leaving; he cannot leave once a child comes into the picture." He leaned forward as he checked the road in order to make a left turn. "It is rather cowardly of the man to leave you alone with a child."

Arturia sighed and kept her gaze ahead of herself. "Well, he didn't know he had a child."

"He didn't?" Diarmuid glanced at her for mere seconds before turning his attention back on the road, his brows knitting together in slight confusion. "Have you ever thought about telling him."

"In fact, I'm telling him now;" she paused and knew that he was surely confused, "Aoife is your daughter." Her tone was much too calm for the news she had announced, but she did not want to alert him whilst he was driving —not that her tone had made a different impact.

Diarmuid pulled the car over because he was about to stop the car in the middle of the road. The car tires screeched and they were both launched forward as the car came to a stop; the laws of physics not failing them the slightest bit.

"Oh my god! What on earth are you doing?" She raised her voice in disapproval of the unsuspected reaction. Truth is, she should have known that he was not going to take the news so lightly.

His grip on the steering wheel tightened as he let his gaze drop to his knees. "What did you say?" He felt his stomach churn and causing him a sickening feeling.

"What are you doing?" She furrowed her brows together, a little bit in confusion and a little bit in aggravation. "That's what I said and I also expect and answer."

"Aoife is my daughter?" His head shot towards her and something between disbelief and bewilderment was evident in his bronze eyes. "I have a child?"

"Yes." She didn't dare look at him or even glance his way, turning back to the dashboard.

"When did you plan on telling me this..." It wasn't a question because he did not expect her to answer it, it was only proper procedure —or that was what he thought.

There was utter silence between them and he was taking uneasy breaths as he continued to try and search for something; answers maybe. He was unsure of what to say and so was she because he could not hold it in his mind that he was a father. The fact was beyond him and he could only marvel in the thought. He was beyond ecstatic but also very disappointed and sad —with himself not her. "What have you told her about me?" He finally murmured something to break the silence.

"Well," she breathed, "she always asked why other people had fathers and she did not; so I told her that sometimes people are taken from us and that they would never return, in other words you died. Of course it was a horrible lie but I did not want to make you out to be a bad guy and to be honest —I did not think you would return."

"I want to visit her more often." It sounded as if he had ignored everything she had said, and that was partly true because he was enraptured in his thoughts. "I want to be part of her life now and I want you to know that I don't find what you did upsetting." He turned to her, giving her a neutral look. "I understand that you wanted to make her feel better; but I also want her to know that I am her father."

"That will not happen." Arturia still kept her gaze beyond the windshield.

Diarmuid took a deep breath. "I at least deserve something."

Arturia was getting anxious and she too took a deep breath, but hers was shaky. "I was about to abort her." He needed to know that, it was only fair. "I know that I should not have even thought that because you had a right to know that I was pregnant and what I was thinking. It was childish and truly absurd of me to have come to that conclusion; but it seemed as if there was not other choice," her voice had cracked as she was speaking rapidly, "and on the day I had made the appointment, I got sick and I never went. I guess that the flu can do something good." She cracked a pained laugh.

He unbuckled his seat belt and killed the engine. "That was not what I meant." His voice was bit husky. "Look at me, Arturia."

She slowly turned her head towards him, and he saw it —the despair they held. He slowly opened the car door and got out, making sure to close the door behind himself gently. He stayed outside for a while, leaning against the car and looking at people walking by wondering if their life was any better. It had been around ten minutes when there was a knock on the window and he deemed it time to return inside the car. He had left the vehicle because she was about to break into tears and he knew —much too well —that she did not like people seeing her cry.

"I apologize for my behaviour." She mumbled lightly.

"Can you look at me again, Arturia?" He asked and she did as asked. Her eyes were glossy and a bit red; not yet puffy. "I love you." He promised that he was not going to confess, but some promises are always broken.


	3. Chapter 3

**~Author's Note~**

**Thank you for the reviews! I am so happy that you guys are liking it, but it is an angsty fic and all so eyyy! And I do agree with Aekaterina39, this paring is much better than GilBer... I don't know; I just don't like him... Anyway please enjoy!**

**Sincerely,**

**~Ms. AtomicBomb**

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><p>"Come in." Arturia mumbled as she opened the door to her apartment. It was when he nodded that she noticed their hands were intertwined. "I'll serve you some tea."<p>

"Thank you, Arturia." He gave a short smile as they entered the flat and walked slowly to the kitchen.

She glanced at him and slipped her hand from his, "Take a seat by the coffee table." She curled her lips into a soft smile.

Diarmuid nodded and smiled a little brighter. "Yes, of course." He nodded and then left the kitchen to sit at the couch by the glass and wooden table. Upon reaching the seat, he sat down and waited for the short female to bring him the tea —but mostly waited to see her face. He had missed the colour of her eyes and the way she was so confident. He understood how she felt; a little betrayed and quite sad. He knew that she was still in pain over his initial leave, but he had already promised her not to leave her. She had not replied to his confession, and it slightly saddened him but he figured that she needed time. Licking his lips, he heard the water boiling and within some time, she emerged from the white kitchen with two mugs in her hand. He immediately stood, "Let me help you."

"I was a King, I think that I can handle something as simple as holding mugs." She chuckled. "I am fine, now obey your king's wishes and take a seat."

"Of course." He smiled and did as she asked. Her voice was so soothing to him, giving him some sort of reassurance for the future.

Arturia set the tea in front of him with a soft smile. "I hope you like it; I am still not used to cooking and serving myself. I am more of a manager type of person." She explained with a shrug as she sat next to him.

"Then maybe I can cook and serve for you." He offered as he slowly and cautiously brought the cup to his lips. "Like I used to."

She set her own mug down on the table and took a deep sigh. "Lancer," he could already tell by the tone of her voice and the name she chose that she was irritated, "I am sorry, but I am not prepared to have a dysfunctional relationship again. You must surely understand that I cannot possibly go through something like this again. You might be the father of my child, but that is all you can be..." He felt awful and tensed up. "For now..."

He slowly smiled as hope snaked into his heart. "I am still in love with you." He chuckled.

She did not reply and only sipped from the tea again whilst scooting next to him, then —out of the nowhere —she kissed his cheek and gave a soft smile. "I know, but I am not yet ready."

It was truly awkward between them and he wanted to ease the tension, so he thought it best to ask permission. "May I kiss you?" He mumbled for they were rather close and he could see soft approval in her mesmerizing green orbs.

"I suppose so —but only this once." She was quick to add as he nodded.

"Yes, of course." Then he leaned in a little, her scent filling his lungs as he could hear her uneasy breathing. He could see that her emerald eyes were beginning to flutter to a close. "I love you." He mumbled before their lips connected to form a —rather short; on his part —sweet and loving kiss. It was full of melancholy and a little bit of angst, but it was something he longed because he had missed her.

Their lips parted and she looked down to play with the sweatpants she wore. "Well..." She pondered on what to say next.

"You needn't say another word —I mean if you do not want." He chuckled nervously and began to squeeze his own hands in anxiousness.

"I think that it is lovely that you want to be there for Aoife, but I also think that it would be best if you and I do not mention that you are her father just yet."

He nodded, "Whatever you wish."

"Diarmuid, I want you to know that I am happy that she is our daughter, but you know that I am never ready for a relationship. God also knows that I was not ready for a child. I only need some time to understand my feelings."

"I will wait for you."


	4. A Family

**~Author's Note~ **

**Okay I am so sorry for the short filler chapter and for not updating in a while. Thank you guys for the reviews and I really hope you all enjoy this chapter. I am very very very sorry for being so late on the update. Enjoy and have a great day!**

**Sincerely,**

**~Ms. AtomicBomb**

* * *

><p>They sat on the couch, it had been around three weeks since they had shared the kiss and it had not become awkward when they kissed because it seemed that Arturia was not really phased by the intimate touch. She had brushed off the awkward and distant feeling that she felt tighten in her stomach and instead they had continued with a different conversation and then it had been time for him to leave. This time around, as they sat, the television was playing and the little girl was sitting next to her mother, a crayon and paper in her hand. "What do I dislike the most about this world?" She reworded the question he had asked. "The individuality of people. I feel that nowadays people do not care the slightest for people around them. That is why there is such a significant division of poor and wealthy. It is rather upsetting to not pay attention to those around you. I have even noticed that I am assimilating into this <em>culture<em>."

"That is an interesting analysis." Diarmuid smiled.

She took a bite from one of the cookies that she had laid out for snacks, "And what of you? What do you dislike about this world?"

The male crossed his arms and leaned back, "Well..." he thought for a little while, "how people mistreat the planet."

"Yes, it is rather depressing. I do not see any more forests around. I only imagine how many trees were cut down in order to build a million of these skyscrapers."

"Now, what do you like about this era?" He turned towards her again.

"I kind of like the efficiency of everything. Quick and easy access to information, cleaning is much quicker, food is sometimes better."

"I think cars are my favourite."

"Cars?" Her brow lifted.

"I would prefer a horse, but a car is comfortable and stylish."

"Stylish?" She almost cringed."What, are you interested in fashion now?"

"No," he chuckled, "but nice cars are _'Beautiful'?_ For lack of a better word. What about you, Aoife," he turned towards the door, a bright smile on his face, "what do you like about this world?"

"Candy." She looked up from her drawing and smiled. "But you too, and mommy!"

Arturia giggled and pat the girls head. "We don't mean people, darling, so we don't count."

"Oh," The girl laughed, "then only candy."

Diarmuid felt happy that he was able to spend time with his daughter as of lately. He would visit in between the week and never fail to help Arturia out with the child on the weekends. He found out that there was a nanny to take care of Aoife while Arturia was at work, but he had never met her for he was also working when the nanny was taking care of the little girl. He had caught Arturia looking at them when he was playing with Aoife and it truly made him happy and relieved because he could feel that she too was happy. The little girl had a liking to him because she never questioned why he suddenly started to visit them very often, she was always happy instead. He could tell that she liked having him around and maybe it was because she finally had a father figure or because she thought he was handsome; whichever it could have been still made him satisfied.

"Aoife, I was thinking if you'd like ice cream, would you?" Diarmuid lifted a brow as he looked intently at the young girl.

As if it was some sort of explosion, the girl looked up at him —green eyes set ablaze with excitement —rather quickly. "Please?" She nodded rapidly and and dropped the red crayon she had in her tiny hands.

"Does your mommy want to join us?" He looked at the female and she blinked for she was unamused.

"Come mommy!"

Arturia looked at her daughter and sighed, "I guess I have no choice." She stood from the couch and waited for the other two to do so as well.

Once they were all prepared, they left the apartment and headed for the ice cream shop around the corner. Diarmuid had Aoife on his shoulders and the little girl kept on pointing at birds as they walked to the store. Upon their arrival, he had lowered the girl and held her hand as they entered. The rest of the day had gone rather swiftly and there were no fights nor disagreements between the two adults. For once, they did look like a family.


End file.
